After a solid week of dreary, cold, rainy days, the sun finally peeked through yesterday. I can not express the difference that the sun can make in my day. My personality brightens. My outlook brightens. My attitude brightens. It’s amazing really.
Yesterday, I went home for the afternoon and worked from there because I was waiting on a package to be delivered that needed a signature. I opened up all my windows and let in the fresh air and sunshine. My computer desk faces this one window where I have a beautiful view of my blooming tree in my front yard. I tell you. . . it was JUST what the doctor ordered.
Even though I was still working, I had the fresh air, the sunshine and the obvious absence of BULLSHIT. There were no people barging into my office every ten minutes sucking my time and energy out of the room. It was like a mini-vacation. . . . away from the people. So I deduced that it’s not my job that I don’t like (I actually LIKE my job), it’s the people.
Ever since our company’s merger, we’ve been forced to work with this new group of employees. And I’ve got to tell you. . . there are some real doozies. I’ve decided that in an attempt to not completely lose my mind, I have to find a sense of humor about these people. I’ve decided that when I get some spare time, I’m going to write a book about them.
I realize that this isn’t a new concept. Scott Adams already has this covered with Dilbert and NBC has it covered with The Office. (But since I’m not doing a cartoon or writing a TV script, I feel fairly certain that I won’t be stepping on any toes) I think I have something fresh I can add.
I’ve already started jotting notes here and there giving the different types of people a name persay. Of course, there’s always The Brown-Noser, also known as The Kiss-Ass. Every office has at least one of those. My favorite so far is The Tosser. Any ideas of what that one means. No, he’s not tossing his cookies. No, this is the guy who tosses you under the bus every chance he gets. I’ve met this guy. I’ve got the treadmarks to prove it. He’s not my friend.
Although harmless, The Talker can be quite annoying. . . and time consuming. He comes to your office to ask a question and an hour later, after you’ve learned all about his mother’s bunions, his children’s soccer game and the effect the economy has on the price of rice in China, someone will feel for me, make a decoy phone call to me to save me from any further mind torture. . . not to mention the colossol waste of time. When does this guy have TIME to actually DO his job? I mean, I can talk. . . but DAMN!
I could go on, as this office is full of comedy potential, but I think I’ll save them for the book. It’s like my virtual goldmine. If it doesn’t kill me first, I’m gonna be rich. But I’m stumped as for a title to the book. I need help. What do you think?
8 users commented in " Office Humor "
Follow-up comment rss or Leave a TrackbackOMG that pic is gorgeous!! No blooms here for at least another MONTH.. you are so lucky!! A book how cool. I know you can do it as for titles who knows.. sometimes they get changed many times before it goes to print anyway. Hope you get to write it someday.
I think Mo should write one too!! Take care : )
can I get an autographed copy? pretty please?
YES! BLUE SKY heals all wounds – don’t you think? Well, maybe not, but it sure helps. I don’t even care if it’s 40 degrees out if the sky is blue and the sun is shining. Of course I would prefer a nice 70-75 day, but blue sky is the most important. My mood is always definately higher when the sky is bluer. Sweetpea too. This cold is killing her, she is craving sunshine and warmth. If I had the money I’d take her someplace warm. She can’t fly without causing increased pain so that almost means driving her to Southern California again. That’s NOT gonna happen.
“As the Office Stomach Churns”
Guaranteed hit!
The Watercooler
I don’t know if you guys actually have one . . . but . . .
Miss hearing that smile in your blog. It was nice to get some of it today. Hugs and love!
(as you can see, I’m getting paranoid in my old age)
Well – which one am I? I’m just the one you gives you the decoy phone call. I think we should lock the door, and of course, I should not touch your batch files or any of your directories. Hopefully Monday will be a better day, but we’ll only know by about 3pm. Hope you are having a nice weekend.
What kind of tree is that? It looks beautiful! And I look forward to your book!
Yes, I need to write a book too. Mine will be, perhaps, “How Many Days It Takes To Shave My Legs.” Or, “How High Does One Go When Shaving Legs Before It Becomes A Brazilian.” Or, “Help, Bring The Weed Eater!”
Perhaps I’ll research who the Sadistic Moron was who invented women shaving their accoutrements and then make a voodoo doll and cover it with all the hair I’ve shaved off my body in preparation for Mexico. Then I’m going to make little razor cuts all over it. See how he or she likes it. Of course he or she is dead by now, but….it will give me great satisfaction, ok?
If God hadn’t invented men, Donna? The world would be full of hairy fat women. I’m not sure if that would be a better world, actually, so now I’m unsure of where I’m going with this.
What was my original point? Oh yeah. Writing a book. Yada yada. I can do that.
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